Monday, 30 July 2012

Coconut Water, The Gift of Nature

Coconut has become a frequent topic of discussion as I visited one of my girlfriend recently.  She noticed a seemingly dark spot on my neck, and on close observation, discovered, its not a pimple nor a blackhead like I had been thinking it was.  According to her, if only I won't mind giving coconut juice a try, it would do me a whole world of good and clear these spots in no time.

The benefits are enormous. This conclusion led me into taking time out to find out more before sharing it here on the blog.

I use to think that the dark spots on my neck was hereditary and thus had no cure or rather didn't deserve much attention until recently when I has this chat with her. It was a shocking revelation indeed. It spurred me into doing a little digging into the world of coconut water and its medicinal values.
They are low in carbs, 99% fat free and low in sugar.  As an health conscious mother, I find this very fasinating and I decided to try it out.

It is known to boost poor blood circulation, cleanse your digestive system, promotes weight loose, detoxify and fights virus, treats kidney and urethral stone, fights diabetics, and boost your immune system.

 The benefits are just too much.  For starters, I want to detoxify my system but to realize that I can do all that with one fruit - coconut......nice.

The dark spots around my neck ( I have seen it on some other ladies faces too), appears to be like blackheads that is growing out but in real fact, flesh. so my girlfriend ( Anny) advised I wash my neck often with the coconut juice / water.

Its cheap affordable and can be gotten easily, so I don't see any harm in going on with it. For one thing, I would want to get rid of the these blackheads cum spots. They are definitely not acne.

Do I hear a voice saying "see a dermatologist"? what do you think?

Rocking my Summer Look

Life is indeed beautiful. I mean especially when you shake yourself loose from some myth that has held you down for long. This is my time to shake them myth  off me and enjoy this summer holiday.

I want to answer my 'Say it like I see it' friend, @Simply Mee. She wants to know how my "getting my groove on" outing on Saturday went.  Well, my dear friend, it went well, still getting comments about my new look.  Oh yes, a whole new summer look. I am rocking it and loving my swag. ( It is said that when the cat is away, the mice is king of the house - my Princess is away, and I am grooving, hehehehe).

Met a few friends that I had lost contact with years now and was invited to a beach party on Saturday.  Hmmm, don't know if I will be chanced to go yet but if I want to follow the dress code of bumb shorts and Tshirt, I might just change my mind

My decision for this particular hair style is sheer out of the conviction that my facial structure will be better defined by it and sure it has been.  I mean, the compliments are too much. I have received dates sef. My cousin wanted to know if I was on a diet? I looked slimmer. I am enjoying this.

I have a little confession though, my hair needs serious treatment as it is breaking and I was adviced to do something about it quickly.  I dont want to go bald abeg like my neighbour, Mrs Pius. lol

Secondly, since I am coming of age, *winks*, I went on to make enquiries about detoxification. I wan dey all round ready for dating o. My skin, hair, nails, figure, and general body fitness must be perfect and ready for the new me, hehehehe. Forgive me people, I am giggling away like a little kid that just got her freedom to play outside after being locked indoors for hours ( in my case months or years).

 Abeg, @Simply Mee, get out of my head, Nooooow!

Source: hairstyle for black women

Saturday, 28 July 2012

Who Should be blamed?

I wonder what kind of education our youth are being given these days. Its a pity because, as repulsive as the thought of this particular story I am about to share is, I wonder who to apportion the blame to.

Let me start from the beginning. I have observed that these days, I just happen to be at the right place at the right time when some juicy gist are being transmitted. Haba! na so I don come like gist reach abi?  I don come turn amebo or coincidentally an investigative journalist or abi na activitist? Anyway, that's for another day. This one scares me more than trying to unravel what I am becoming jare.

I told myself , enough is enough with the deception that is going on in my life. Oh yes! I stood there facing myself in the bathroom mirror, making sure that I particularly drive home the message into my thick skull. A social life that is activated should remain activated! Gbam!

While this cross examination session or rather interrogation session was going on, I was holding in my hand the ticket to the comedy show 'Stand Up Nigeria'. I was having double mind. I can deceive myself! But that was not going to be, at least not for this particular show. The ticket na N3,500 ( three thousand five hundred naira). I gatz to be there ( In Sulia's voice alias Funke Akindele, lol )

Off to the saloon to have my hair done jeje, so I can be sure there is no excuse ( by the way, Princess is off to my Sister's for the next 2weeks). It was at the saloon that the story unfolded and my antenna got full record of the gist and I even  asked more questions where I needed more clarifications or elaborations.

Ladies can gossip abeg! The two ladies seated beside me were either trying to make sure that everyone knew that their other friend ( Floxy) is either too wayward or just stupid unlike them that are smart and could get away with any kind of vises! Floxy is lying critically ill in a traditional maternity home! 'Who uses such places these day?' Question! Na who I go ask? Beats me.

The gist is Mariam, Tosan and Floxy are friends and live in the same neighbourhood in Akoka. They hang out and do so many things together. Somehow along the line, Floxy got pregnant. Yes, the responsible guy Akin wants her to keep the pregnancy and have the baby but on one condition that Floxy lives with his mother until she delivers! 'For real? Okay.

Why? Floxy parents didn't want her having a child out of wedlock! Gbam! She has no option as it were. But, Iya Akin is a firm believer that the old traditional way of taking care of a pregnant woman is the best, so off she went and "registered" Floxy in one of these quack trado homes. There she was given a 'ring' to wear and was advised not to remove it until she is brought in when she is in labour. Concoction to drink wasn't left out.

Iya Akin wanting to ensure that her young 'daughter in-law' gets the best care, made sure she kept her appointment given by the Mama at the home. Floxy, obeyed too.

She was checked and fingered to ensure that the baby was well positioned! Wonderful!

Labour started around mid day exactly 9 months and 6days after. Iya Akin rushed Floxy ( Folashade for real), to the trado home. Nobody can really tell what they mix in those herbs nor the meaning of the ring she was adviced not to remove from finger. It was checked on arrival sef, according to the story teller ( I asked jare). For Floxy, going traditional in this day and age as a young lady that would have at least attended Secondary school baffles me. This is because, she had serious complications from the home and the baby was still born!

A lot of unpublishable things were said to have been done to her private part in the process of delivering the baby. I was so unsettled on my seat as I listened to the gory details. Ha! Man's inhumanity to another. In this modern day? You mean all these Local Council officials  going about in Lagos State don't see these homes? It must mean they are not registered or else if they are, why allow them in the city? I mean, this incident happened in the City and not in one village?

I am confused. I sat down there, socked and not sure what to believe. So Folashade ( Floxy) is lying down now in  a 'real' hospital critically sick and the Traditional home Mama is going on with her 'medical' practice and nobody is suing her? Something is wrong here.

I hate what illiteracy can break an innocent youth to become. But really, who to be blamed?

Friday, 27 July 2012

Yewande, I feel your Pain ( 2)

I have noticed how complex some seemingly easy task can become difficult in accomplishing in the schedule time. I made a promise to go through all my past post and reply every one of the past comments that I didnt reply and I am glad I have done that.

Next, is the story of Yewande, a tough one, and I am doing the follow up on the story........but with a little digression.  Please read this story as it might open you up to some of the few answers to the questions of single mothers and some of their challenges.  Happy reading.

Abandoned by hubbies, single mothers of multiples seek solace in street begging!
By:Jibola Oyekunle       

Faced with the challenge of eking out a living after being abandoned by their husbands and fathers of their children, many single mothers in Lagos are fast taking to street begging for survival. Checks showed that in spite of the ban recently placed on street begging in the state, some female beggars, especially the single mothers are still sneaking into the streets where they employ all sorts of tricks to woo passers-by. 

Although some of the female beggars who spoke to our reporters in recent en-counter expressed willingness to quit beg-ging as soon as they found a better alterna-tive, findings revealed that many of them have fallen in love with begging, which they started long ago, as they see it as an easy and profitable business venture.
In order to draw sympathy from their prospective givers, findings showed that a number of them devise several deceptive gimmicks, including feigning blindness and other forms of disability. While many of them make use of their own biological children in carrying out their ignoble means of livelihood, a few go out of their way to hire babies, especially sets of twins, triplets to boost their chances of winning the hearts of generous givers.
Interestingly, findings further showed that not many of the kids some of them parade as twins or triplets are genuine as they, on many instances, pair hired children from different mothers, whom they dress up in the same cloths to deceive un-suspecting alms givers.
Apart from the criminal gimmick of us-ing hired infants, investigations revealed that some women even present their own children as fire accident victims. To make people believe their claims, they are of the habit of dressing the body parts of such innocent kids with cotton wool dappled in palm oil or iodine and gentian violet.

In some instances, you are even present-ed with more scary pictures of purported victims of an inferno, by decorating their childrens naked bodies with saw dust mixed with some ointment to give it a dis-gusting look.
Although none of those who spoke to our reporter admitted to have ever employed any of the tricks since they started begging, almost all of them agreed that such deceptive people abound among them. In trying to justify their chosen means of livelihood, some of the women beggars told our reporter that they had resorted to begging to avoid the temptation of going into crime and prostitution after their husbands dumped them and left them in the lurch.

For instance, Memunat, who oftentimes plies her trade on the Ikeja pedestrian bridge along Lagos-Abeokuta Expressway, said hers was not a divination by any oracle but that she took to the act when the man that put her in the family way took to his heels. “I am a single mother of three. I have a daughter and this set of twins.
One is a boy and the other one is a girl. They were initially a set of triplets but one of them did not survive. My husband ran away and abandoned me in the hospital after he found out that they were triplets. Even before I had the triplets, he had never been a responsible husband. He was a bus-conductor and spent the little money he made every day on alcohol and prostitutes. I did not want my children to suffer and that was why I decided to beg on the street as I believe that the good luck that always comes with their birth would bring favour to my side one day.

“This is not to say that I am not willing to quit the job. I am ready to do any better business so far as it is going to put food on my table and leave me with enough money to raise my children. My first daughter is in primary school here in Lagos and it is the money that I get from here that I use in sponsoring her. Whatever we have left is what we spend on feeding and to pay my house rents,” Memunat said.

It was the same tale of abandonment for Florence, another self-acclaimed single mother who also begs with a set of triplets. Although she showed unwillingness to respond to most of the questions she was asked, Florence appeared unequivocal in her claim that her husband abandoned her after she gave birth to her triplets. “My husband is a bus conductor and we had two kids together before we had this set of triplets.
We were living in Ibadan before. But shortly after I had these babies, he abandoned me and came to Lagos. I have been searching for him since I came to La-gos but I am yet to see him. I have to resort to begging to survive and also feed these innocent babies. I don’t have any particular place where I sleep. I sleep outside, any-where that is secure for me.”

Mama Obinna, who was seen begging for alms to take care of her fire victim son, at Mile 2 recently, told Saturday Mirror that begging was never an alternative she ever desired to explore in her life. She said that she was forced to beg for alms because there was nobody to assist her when her son was involved in fire accident. “I never thought I would beg for alms in my life.

It is not an honourable job for anybody but now that I am faced with a challenge that is beyond my power, I had no alternative than to beg for alms since in my judgment it is better than prostitution and stealing. “I was married but my husband for no good reasons left me and the children for another woman. We have been engaging in food vending to survive since he left us.

I took to alms begging when my son that is lying here was burnt by the fire of the food we were cooking. I have spent all the mon-ey I had yet the wound has not healed. It is what I get from begging that I have been us-ing to take care of him and to also put food on the table for my other children. I would stop as soon as the wound heals as I want to go back to my business,” she said.

Commenting on the trend, Mr. Ajala Muniru, a Psychologist at the Lagos State Uni-versity (LASU), expressed concern over the likely negative psychological impact it could have on the affected children, say-ing the future of such children is shrouded in uncertainties. Muniru said: “When you look at the circumstance of those people involved in this, they seem to have low self concept.

The children that are brought up under such condition tend to have a very low self concept. People tend to look down on them as children of paupers. These children will grow up and learn all this from their peers. When this is internalized, it becomes a big problem in terms of relating with others in the environment and even their friends. Isolation then set in. “The stigma attached to that will not make such children to grow properly and behave the way their contemporaries or mates will behave. Their developmental process is already battered as memories of what happened in the past would continue to haunt them and in distant future they will start to regret. Regression will set in.

They will start seeing themselves as not being fortunate like their peers. The world today is more competitive. So, you would suffer when you are the type that is not equipped with social skill to be able to match up with your colleagues when it comes to scouting for jobs. “All these when taken in would make development process of those children not to be well tutored in the right way.On the part of the mother, the idea that others would know and see her as a beggar would make her not to live up to expectation.

As a woman and wife in the home, when she goes out there and starts begging with her children, the environment in which she lives will become hostile. She won’t even be able to keep friends. She would even decide to go outside her home to make friends. “It will just be a matter of time when people get to know that is what she does. Then they forsake her. I am talking about loneliness and isolation setting in and these are psychological. It would affect her mental functioning and then anxiety would set in.

Here you talk about neuro-sis, when you go to medical hospital these days; you tend to see people with social problems that have graduated to psychotic level.


Thursday, 26 July 2012

My Sincere apologies

I want to sincerely apologies to all my friends and everyone who visited and read my post for the past three weeks now and were not able to post a comment(s) or otherwise. I am really sorry. I  didn't know what happened. I suspect I must have clicked the wrong box in the blog setting.

I want to personally thank @Simply Mee. I appreciate you for bringing this to my attention. I have corrected the mistake  and hopefully I won't go clicking away again.

I did go mobile a while back and I must say this one has its disadvantages too.  Aside the jumping of letters when I am typing thereby leaving behind a trail of typo errors, I am not getting the right fonts!

Anyway, I believe all of these will soon be a thing of the past. I will appreciate all your comments as its does encourage me to keep going on.

Thank you everyone

Tuesday, 24 July 2012

How Time Flies....its my birthday

Only yesterday, I was so excited of being an eligible voter. That seems now like donkey years ago.

Yeah, I know, I won't tell ( ladies don't tell their ages). Afterall, its been said that age is but a number. So I am still sweet sixteen till I say otherwise, lol

I have only gratitude for my beautiful life.

Thank you Lord Jesus for life.

Happy birthday to me :)

Friday, 20 July 2012

Yewande, I feel your pain

Each day passes with a cause to be grateful for the gift of life, good health amongst other things. For some, its far from it.

I am heart broken, and  my spirit bleeds because of my encounter and subsequent chat I had today with Yewande and her twins in Surulere ( Suburb of Lagos State). The sight of the beautiful kids in such an environment broke my heart.  I adore twins. I would want one of my own someday ( God willing).

Maybe, I can say that was the first attraction but the dirty spot the mother and kids were seated left room for my curiousity to her and her story that broke my heart.

Sometimes, during my 'exhaling' sessions,  I have asked so many questions, 'how one gets to find herself being a single mother ( or even father)'. I mean you plan your life so carefully from your youth with dreams that you back up with prayers, even strict parental discipline and yet find yourself  wondering why? How come?

Yewande's like many others all over the world irrespective of country, are doing some soul searching, looking for the right answers. Will the answers ever come?

NB: I will give a the story of Yewande tomorrow but right now, I need to 'exhale' . Its been a remarkable day.

Wednesday, 18 July 2012

Excited but Sapped

My sincerely apologies to everyone. I am so sorry for not keeping you posted for the past 5days. Its been hectic down here in our 'Palace'. Oh, yes! The preparations has been in top gear as the D day drew nearer. It is finally here. Today is the graduation day of Princess. The excitment is so contagious any passerby would just fall under the ' anointing', lol.

All activities in school had to be rehearsed again at home, just to ensure that there as no mistake in any of the moves. everything has to just be perfect. Princess  won't want to be caught napping on her day.

What about me? Please somebody look my way na? I mean, check on me too to make sure I don't brakdown or crash. Oh, that word just reminded me of the pain of having my Blackberry crashing in the midst of the whole getting the perfect graduation party ready.  I lost a lot of information and my pictures are all gone. The prices mother's pay sometimes.It dropped from my hand.

So, I am up this early to 'exhale' and congratulate myself for a job well done. Yes, its been  wonderful week. The ceremony will commence in her school by 10am today ( Thursday), and they party continues at home later.

Everything is ready! Hurray! I am so excited myself. Cake? Ready ( am actually staring at it now). Suit and camisol? Ready. Speech and the purple tie-dye outfit specially made for the occassion? Ironned and hanging in the wardrobe
. Hair? ooh all, done and under hair-net as Princess sleeps, lol. I get to have mine done ( thank God for wigs, lol).

I have a camera ready to capture every beautiful moment. I just love my job! Motherhood is fun! Sapped yes, but just excited.

I hope you all are having a beautiful week thus far?

Friday, 13 July 2012

When we were Kids

What a relief? Exams are finally over today and all that is left is the graduation party. By this time next week, it will be all over! Hurray! No more waking up by 4:30am!

 I can't wait for the term to end. Gush, I mean no more school runs? Whao. I can really get to sleep an extra hour or two? Wonderful. Some schools here in Lagos have closed while some like Princess's  will be vacating next week.

I remember in our days how excited we use to be just remembering we wont be in school for 2 months. Do you remember this song?

Holiday is coming
Holiday is coming
No more Morning Bells
No more Teacher's whip
Good bye Teachers, Good bye Scholars,
I am going jolly holiday .

Times have changed. I wonder what song these kids will be singing for their teachers and friends as they vacate this third term for the long summer holiday.

Tomorrow morning, we will be going shopping for the skirt suit and lilac shirt for the graduating class. it promises to be a fun filled day already as princess is excited.

I hope your week was beautiful too. Do have a wonderful weekend everyone

Saturday, 7 July 2012

Divas of Cyber world

Time waits for no one , so the saying goes. I try to make my seconds count and keep me busy as much as I can. Today is one of such days, washing ( oh there was a little sunshine after so many days of continous rainful in Lagos). General cleaning, very essential.

While all of this is going on, I have Princess, reading and preparing for her forth coming examination on Monday. I had my hands full today. Motherhood, what's a beautiful life.

I almost forgot I promised to give Zeal ( Elizabeth Abidemi Akinlabi) a call! Gush! We have an appointment today! She is handfull, ever busy. I mean literally, she has her own hands full of so many activities. An accomplished Nigerian musician, a single mother, fashion designer, model, the list goes on and on. She still finds time for her charity work.

I am so amazed how she keeps up with all these! While my Saturday is all about me , Princess and how to get our acts together, Zeal is making cupcakes, going to charity homes, orphanage to give gifts!

She is just the Diva! Sisters keeping busy, giving a helping hand to the less fortunate in our society. I say its fulfilling

To all the Divas out there, I am saying, thank you for holding it together and making the world a better place.

Friday, 6 July 2012

This is my Treat!

The episode with the key issue turned out that the key wasn't lost after all but Princess locked it inside and assumed that she had it in her jeans pocket. That was a good relieve but I have taken other precaution against it happening next time. It was an experience on its own.

So, with all these and many more coming, I am in for some exhaling right now. I mean, a hardworking single mother like myself also needs a special treat once in a while. I mean something different, not tea or biscuits, not cupcakes, nothing extra special but definitely African and affordable, lol.

This weather has been messing up my hormones and I needed to deal with it seriously last tonight. Haba, Abegi, I can't shout! I have reached the verdict.

It had to be hot, spicy, good enough to combat this cold that makes me curl up in bed every night, lol. Wow! That's letting out a little secret, lol. Yeah, yeah, i know, some lonely single mothers do feel "cold' too. So, the sauce must have enough "tatashe, atarodo, alias chili (pepper), i mean all the right ingredients to make it as spicy enough to deal with this terror called cold, lol. Pepper soup did sound more like it at first, but I finally conclude on what the treat should be Ofada Rice and its special spicy stew!

For those who might be interested in preparing this for yourself and join the army of those of us who would want to face this common enemy, here are the ingredients and the how to:

•Red pepper (ata rodo, and tatashe)
.Goat meat
•Palm oil
•Knorr or Maggi Cubes

Wash and cut all the assorted meat into a pot and season with thyme, salt, maggi, ginger,onion.When cook, taste to make sure its tender, set aside from the heat.

Blend the red pepper, tomatoes ( not much cos it is suppose to be spicy and hot) and onion. Its shouldn't be finely blended so that you can still see the flesh of the pepper, tomatoes and its seed

Heat up palm oil, add sliced onion and heat it till the onion is slightly brown and the palm oil is lightly bleached and blended mixture, season it with magii n salt
•Allow to fry, when almost done, add the assorted meat with a little stock ( if so desire) and keep frying

When cooked, take off the burner and allow it to simmer.

I had mine with white rice and water, lol ( I know this will go well with Ofada rice or boiled yam. That will be for another day.

Bon apetite

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

A Tear Today

This month seems to be running so fast, its the 4th already, whao! I celebrate with my friends across the borders, happy anniversary.

Its been work, work, work. Hectic life of a single mother. In the heat of trying to meet up with so many things at the same time, my once so taught up, scheduled life just all come crumbling down and at that moment, I look away because a tear is trickling down my cheek!

Oh yes, I break down! I cry, silently though, because, I am human and I don't always have all figured out.

I got back home today and was locked out of our "Palace" for almost 2 hours! How come? My Princess misplaced my spare key that I had given to her in the morning. This I had thought was a safer option because the traffic yesterday made me get home a hour late as compared to 6pm when I get home daily. More over I needed to get back on time to keep an eye on her preparations for her forth-coming examination.

Usually, Princess gets back home for 4:30pm daily. The school is a 10minutes drive to the house with the school bus. Once inside the compound, she stays with my next door neighbour in their apartment with their other 3 kids ( the fourth is off to boarding school). She would have gone into our "Palace", changed, have her lunch, then her books to go join them in their apartment.

Today was different as she couldn't explain what happened and she couldn't find our key.

I called my younger sister who also lives with us ( yes, I have a Tenant), from work to try and beat the traffic so she can get back home sooner.

I cried silently inside as I look at my Princess. Will I ever get it all figured out? Its a question I am sure I may never get answers to in this journey.

NB: I got this book today, little did I know that I was going to be acting my role before the end of the day. Hmmm, irony of life

Monday, 2 July 2012

Moment of Calm............tea time

For the past couple of days its been raining in the city of Lagos and the cold has been something else entirely. The nights have been really cold, wow! Being single and all that you would know what that means, lol.

However, the damages that came with the heavy rains had also been devastating. SO many properties damaged. My heart just goes out to a lot of families that have been caught up in all of this. Properties damaged, kids not being in school, roads not motorable, its a lot. And to think that the Lagos state government made a lot of efforts to have the drainage cleared before the rains came calling! Well, that's speaking for the State Government but the local councils didn't do much if I am allowed to say so.

My own remedy for this weather and the cold that came with it, the running nose,is making sure that my Princess is well "geared" for the school daily and always wrapped up when at home, and for her Highness, moi, (drums rolling).........TEA!!!!

Oh yes! The weather has brought out the best of tea drinking out of me. I am suddenly an addict and I honestly don't think I am going to be stopping anytime soon, *winking* ( I don't have a human blanky).

Teas are medicinal in itself. This has been proven over thousands of years now. This is so true cos my favourite brand - Twinings.

My favourite? Twinings Camomile, Honey and Vanilla. Its been it for me for a long while now. Snuggle up on the sofa with a steaming mug of my favourite tea, is heavenly. The sweetness of the honey and the rich flavour of the vanilla are the perfect companions for the delicate, floral taste of camomile. Each sip is dreamily sweet - a soothing blanket for your body and soul.hmmmmmm, nose in the air.

In 1706, Twinings was one of the first companies to introduce tea drinking to the British when Thomas Twining began selling tea from his first premises on the Strand in London. 300 years later, Twinings is now a purveyor of teas worldwide.

Tea has enough health benefits most especially Chamomile flower tea. For those who have difficulties relaxing or sleeping, you could join me, it is my late night favourite. Others are orange flowers, citronella herb,linden flowers, passionflower herb, Valerian root and green tea ( The poly-phenol found in the green tea works to intensify levels of fat oxidation and the rate at which your body turns foods into calories. It increases metabolism and could be very beneficial to take in weight loss diet).

So instead of sleeping pills, you could try out any of these teas and you will be amazed. They are so easy to prepare and if you boil the water with the tea bag in the kettle or tea pot, allow it to steep for a while, and then squeeze the bag well, you will be sure to get the very best out of your favorite tea also. I take mine without milk.

Please do share with me, which of these other top 10 brands is your favourite?

1. Lipton
2. Celestial Seasonings
3. Salada
4. Twinings
5. Good Earth Teas
6. East Indian Company
7. Ginar
8. The Nashville Tea Co
9. The Tea Chest
10. Steep

Have a lovely day my friends xxxxx