Wednesday, 20 June 2012

But I am a Novice a friend in need

Its be a beautiful week thus far, thank God. I don't want to dwell on the negatives cos its disheartening enough already. Let's just keep praying for Nigeria and our Leaders.

I will be meeting Sumbo for lunch later today. I am not sure what to expect though. I am the last person to know what advice to give a married lady. I mean a novice like me. All I know is being a single mother.

I heard Marriage can be a wonderful experience. It can be painful, frustrating, hilarious, comforting, annoying and tender.

Anyway, I got a few things jotted down, that I read up somewhere. I hope it does help her. I believe Sumbo just wants to let it all out. I will give her all the listening ears she needs and my shoulders to lean on, afterall, what are friends for.

NB: These are the tips I jotted down, oooh, this is not easy.

1. Ladies, please don't belief that he will always be romantic. It is very unrealistic expectations to believe that your partner, based on the way he behaved during the courtship to remain like that in marriage. That doesn’t mean you have to give up on romance, just don’t expect a ‘grand gesture’ every day

2. Learn to 'talk'about serious issues. There is a difference between talkiing and nagging , hmmm.

3. What if "happily ever after doesn't happen?

4. Ladies, it is advised not to believe that you can change him. Women have a tendency to gloss over qualities they don’t like in a man, telling themselves ‘oh, he’ll change’ or ‘I’ll work on that’. It doesn’t work, because you can’t force a person to change. If you do manage to bully him into changing, your relationship will suffer. Either accept and enjoy the differences between you or create an environment that encourages him to want to change for you.

5. Giving up friends and interests. Don't get lost in being married that you forget your own identity. hmmm.

I hope this comes out well, I am so apprehensive. A friend in need is a friend indeed.


Che said...

Hi dear, just like you said, I think Sumbo wants to pour her heart out to a friend, trusting that you won't be judgmental towards her. The tips you jotted down makes a lot of sense. You just go and be the good friend that you are to her already.

Glad to know your week has been lovely so far. Enjoy the rest of the week.

@ilola said...

nice tips.

Singlenaijamum said...

@ilola, thank you. How you doing?

Anonymous said...

You are a good friend to give her a shoulder to cry on...and good tips...goodluck with your counselling.

p.s,,,pls who mis Sumbo?

Singlenaijamum said...

@Che, thank you. She does indeed a friend who would listen assuring her to open up and exhale. Its refreshing .

Singlenaijamum said...

@ Simply Mee, how you dey? Thanks for the compliment. Sumbo is my girlfriend that got married a few months ago. I mentioned her in my earlier post.